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Kim Kardashian + Kanye West Named Their Baby, And We Hope You’re Sitting Down for This

Kim Kardashian Kanye West
Pacific Coast News

Celebrities are known for giving their kids awful — or at least mock-worthy — names. From Gwyneth Paltrow’s daughter Apple to Nic Cage’s son Kal-El (that’s Superman’s birth name, for you non-nerds out there), it’s a good thing these kids have famous parents who can afford private bodyguards on playgrounds.

But it looks like Kim Kardashian and Kanye West might very well have trumped them all.

According to TMZ, the birth certificate for the little girl the couple had last weekend says her name is … North.

Barring some practical joker who’s punking TMZ, that makes her full given name North West.

Look, we don’t have a lot of kids among us around here, but it seems to me that when you’re naming a daughter, you should imagine her being introduced by a strip club DJ — and if she doesn’t need a stage name for the gig, maybe you should opt for something else.

On the upside? Rob Morrow’s daughter Tu probably doesn’t feel so terribly alone now.

Next: Celebrity Baby Names That Prove Their Parents Didn't Love Them

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