When we were kids, it was all about who was “going out with” who… but not until we were all sure that members of the opposite sex no longer had cooties. cute kids kissing
When my dad heard me say, “Oh, they are going out,” I could always count on the response of “Where are they going?”  While that was incredibly embarrassing as a teenage girl, now that I am in my thirties, I have found myself asking similar questions regarding who is “talking to” who… “What are they talking about?”  I never thought that I would be the naïve parent who is clueless about pre-teen lingo, yet I sometimes find myself out of the loop amongst the YOLOs and SMHs. Was it really this difficult to understand us when we were their age?  Whether you want to call it “going steady,” “going out,” “talking to,” or “going with,”
I was happy that at least I would not have to deal with it for many, many years from now with the boys being only 9 and 10.

So yesterday, I got a phone call from one of my 10-year-old son’s teachers. She left a message that I should come to the school early to talk about something that had happened earlier in the day.  Of course almost every parent would get a sense of dread at a call like this, and this was no exception.  My first thought was that my son (who has Asperger’s) had done something inappropriate.  My second thought was that someone had been mean to him, which only intensified my stress over the situation.  When I arrived at the school, I found out that maybe a little bit of both of my initial thoughts were true. Apparently, my son had kissed a little girl on the cheek, at the urging of other students.  The first instinct of the school was that the other children had taken advantage of my son’s tendency to be easily persuaded.  The school dealt with the situation accordingly, as they are very protective of him (which I appreciated!).

Upon talking to my son, however, the story took on quite a new twist. Apparently, 3 girls were arguing about which one was his girlfriend, and they decided that whoever he kissed would be “the one.”  He told me that the reason he kissed a particular girl is that she was the most annoying and would not leave him alone, and he just wanted her to be quiet!  While I was very happy to hear that no one was treating my son badly, I also had to remind him that we cannot put our hands (or other parts of our bodies) on our friends.  He was glad to hear that he was not in trouble, but his happiness quickly turned to anger when he realized that he had been manipulated a bit.  His response made me laugh out loud; with a furrowed brow, he said, “Mama, girls are evil tricksters!” After my laughter settled, I had to give him the only logical, motherly response… “That’s right son, and don’t you forget it!”  Maybe I have a bit longer before I have to stress over who is “talking to” who after all!

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