Move Over Florida, Texas Has Crazier Laws Still On the Books

The silliest Texas Laws. Really.

Abilene: It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing.

Amarillo: One must give his or her victim a 24-hour notice before committing a crime against that person

Borger: It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts, riding crops and explosive firecrackers of any kind.

Dallas: It’s illegal to possess realistic dildos.

El Paso: Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons “of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectoration's into them.

Galveston: One needs permission from the director of parks and recreation before getting drunk in any city park.

Houston: It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.

Houston: Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.

Port Arthur: Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.

San Antonio: It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.

Texarkana: Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.

More laws that are statewide:

It is illegal to sell one’s eye

It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos.

It is illegal to milk another person’s cow.

That pretty much blows my weekend.