With Valentine’s Day approaching,  I always think in my mind what I would like to happen.  I think most women do.  We have been trained by our moms, friends, V Day cards, magazines, commercials and movies to all think what real romance is. 

My husband knows I love being near the water.  Maybe he will whisk me off to a surprise weekend getaway for just the two of us.  Roses, candies, candles, dim lighting, walks along the ocean, you know the works of a romantic time.  Maybe he will get us a spa time and some pedis.  That would be a weekend to remember.  In my mind this is what I envision of a romantic weekend.

But romance isn’t about what I want.  It should be about what we want.  My husband is a musician, and he loves to go to concerts.  He also has wanted to go hunting.  If I were to ask him what romance was he would say something about seeing a concert or maybe going on a hunting trip?  He would probably want to go somewhere cold weathered.  I hate cold weather.

So in order for us both to be happy we have to find a middle ground, and we both have to release the other of our big expectations.  I can’t hold him to the standards of what Gerard Butler did in “PS, I Love You”.  I can’t expect him to recite such love words as Ryan Gossling did in “The Notebook”.  After all, he doesn’t have a team of writers helping him say the right things, and neither do I.  We both are imperfect people, looking at each other through our own eyes trying to show the other true love.

You see, I know my husband loves me.  He shows me in his own ways.   I really need to keep looking at what he does do for me, and stop looking at what Hollywood says he should do for me.  After all, it’s not like Hollywood is known for lasting marriages.  I love our marriage and I know he loves me.

That is what I will remember on V Day.  He loves me, he really does!

Photo Courtesy of Jess C.
Photo Courtesy of Jess C.

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