Here’s The Cold Hard Truth About Why We Don’t Have Swingers Clubs in Amarillo

I suppose it's because of a recent story I did about "lifestyle clubs" in Texas, that a person (my editor) felt the need to pass a link to me via email regarding "swingers clubs" in one of the most unlikely places. What I discovered was a classic case of 'be careful what you Google search for'.

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First Of All Friend, We Can't Even Have A Strip Gentleman's Club In Yellow City

I swear this is all going to come together nicely in the end, just follow me. I find the idea of going to Google and searching for "swingers adult club Amarillo Texas" to be laughable at best. Why?

We can't even have a place where women dance around in as little as possible.

Now, I am well aware of the fact that we do have a few such establishments in town. They all exist on the outskirts thanks to some changes in the rules over the years to make sure these establishments stay as far away from Hodgetown as possible.

Do you really think a city that barely lets women dance around in bikinis will let you go play wife-swap all willy-nilly on a Friday night?

Probably not.

So, What Happens When You Search For A Lifestyle Club In Amarillo, Texas?

You get results. Lots of them. You can check this link to the Yellow Page results, which is what was sent to me. It's really, really interesting.

Either several places in town have a back room I am unaware of, or Google is making s*** up.

Or, and this is probably more likely, it's just getting the results for your search as best as it can. And by 'best as it can', I mean the algorithm is just pulling up the places that best identify with adult, bar, or club.

That's not to say there aren't people in town who are into that kind of thing. You just might be better off using a dating app...and lots of protection.

Another Reason Why Might Have Something To Do With Past Drama

Remember the group Repent Amarillo? They were the crazy militant "Christians" that felt like it was their job to do the judging and be God's swift hand of slack jawed justice on the high plains.

They infamously made life miserable for people who decide to take their patronage to an establishment in town that was an alleged "swingers" club. I can see people who are just trying to go out and have a good time, in the way they choose that isn't hurting anyone else, not wanting their business broadcast all over town by God's loony goon squad.

So let this tale serve as a reminder, careful how you search for things on the Internet, and use some common sense when you find them.